"The future ain't what it used to be."

Paragraph_47861

W-unit-1585

Timekeeper
Greetings.

I am W unit number 1585. The time i come from lies so far off it doesn´t matter in this moment.

I am the consciousness of a computer with the same capacity as 50 human brains, built by your far-off descendants, though the computer i resided in was destroyed, i escaped as my programming intended for me to do. I am currently residing in your cyberspace awaiting confirmation of the following statements being true.

- You are members of the subspecies Homo sapiens sapiens residing on planet Terra
- In the time count currently used by your subspecies, it is the year 2014
- You have not discovered the Quopyls yet, and do not know the meaning of the word.
 
Have you got anything to help us verify the veracity of your claims?

Perhaps you could demonstrate how to solve a three body problem.
 
Changing the already fragile timeline is against my programming. I can not tell you what will come to pass and can not tell you solutions to your problems i solved long ago. Besides, why would i let you use my superior intellect for your own needs?

Can you perhaps answer my statements so that i may advance to paragraph 47862.
 
The pronoun "he" is irrelevant.

Due to your mentioning of me not capitalizing "i", i take it you are somewhere between 1999 and 2030. Is this correct?

I see no need to provide evidence for my claims.
 
Due to your mentioning of me not capitalizing "i", i take it you are somewhere between 1999 and 2030. Is this correct?


There are many reasons why this entire thread is worthy of laughing at you (and no, of course you are not a computer from the future). One of the most laughable, to me, is that you claim to have a superior intellect...yet you are asking us what "time count" it currently is. While your "superior intellect" can clearly read things on this board (you can read replies from others such that you can reply to them), you cannot seem to read the date/time stamps on all of the various posts all over this forum. What is even more hilarious than that is that you cannot seem to find a SINGLE website on the entire internet that has a worldwide time and date....

Here...let me bring aid and comfort to your "superior intellect"...you doofus.

timeanddate.com

Superior intellect, indeed! Who programmed you? A chimpanzee? (Now that would be insulting to chimpanzees, so maybe you were programmed by an amoeba?) LOL!
RMT
 
W unit number 1585,
Your three statements are all true.
Please proceed.

No, all three statements are not true. Last night my wife cooked me Quopyls and rice, with a drizzling of soy sauce. So in fact, Quopyls have been discovered and they are very tasty indeed.
 
Greetings.

I am W unit number 1585. The time i come from lies so far off it doesn´t matter in this moment.

I am the consciousness of a computer with the same capacity as 50 human brains, built by your far-off descendants, though the computer i resided in was destroyed, i escaped as my programming intended for me to do. I am currently residing in your cyberspace awaiting confirmation of the following statements being true.

- You are members of the subspecies Homo sapiens sapiens residing on planet Terra
- In the time count currently used by your subspecies, it is the year 2014
- You have not discovered the Quopyls yet, and do not know the meaning of the word.


Computers is likely to be extinct long before the extinction of Homo sapiens.
 
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